Discover a New, Little Known Secret to Success

I have spent the last few posts discussing the concept of success and shared how it is applicable to anyone (corporate leaders, single-parents or individuals experiencing traumatic change in their life). I defined success as: "Gaining or attaining the desires of our heart" and concluded that it's not necessarily related to finances, material possessions, who we know or where we go.

Now, I’d like to share with you a surefire framework that will guarantee success. This framework uses a concept I call: The 3R’s.  This concept came about during a period of self-reflection and personal growth where I looked back over my life and tried to determine the infinitesimal difference between success and failure. I used this concept to write and publish my book titled: “The 3R's of Spiritual Growth”.  The 3R's are: Recognition, Reconciliation and Reconnection. This framework can be utilized by anyone to successfully address and solve any of life’s problems areas.

The first step is to Recognize the impartial forces, factors and issues that are at work in our life and influence how we respond to it. We then recognize our negative core beliefs, which hinder us from attaining our goals.

Next, we learn how to set goals that are aligned with who and what we are. Much of our stress occurs when we set goals or desire objects that have been attained or belong to someone else which are not aligned with our purpose for living. This easily happens when we allow our desires to run rampant and influence our activities. These are the times when our lives really begin to get out of whack.

The cool part about the 3R framework is that it recognizes each and every one of us has a purpose for living that only we can achieve. This framework provides us with comfort and satisfaction as we proceed towards our goals by helping us stay in touch with our 3-part nature.

Next, we Reconcile where we are in life with what we want and desire. We do this by taking responsibility for the circumstances and situations in which we find ourselves.  We then develop a plan that moves us in the direction of our desired success. Along this path we will employ our understanding of “The Law of Cause and Effect” which simply says: “We choose how we experience life”.

Finally we take what we learned and Reconnect back into every nook, cranny, circumstance and situation in our life. We apply what we've recognized and reconciled into those areas of our life that aren’t working. When we accomplish this we will find that: our stress will be reduced, our health will improve and we will be able to experience life's unspeakable joys by remaining in the present moment and trusting in our new ability to successfully respond to whatever life throws our way.

This 3R framework can be easily taught to anyone desiring it. I hope that you have enjoyed this post and here's hoping that you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless.

Leaders Should Be Servants

I had the privilege today to be part of a small, select group of individuals that participated in a workshop presented by a world-class speaker/trainer/named Ed (The Rainmaker) Robinson. In this workshop, he outlined the steps necessary to create a successful speaking business.  His presentation confirmed my belief that in order to be truly successful we must first seek to help and be a benefit to others. No more than 5 min. into the workshop Mr. Robinson had us perform an exercise that identified obstacles to our business growth. He then spent the remainder of his presentation ensuring that each and every one of our obstacles was addressed.

In my opinion, this makes The Rainmaker a true servant leader. A servant leader is one who accomplishes their goals or purpose by helping the members of his team to reach their full potential and therefore perform at their best. It doesn't matter who is on the team or where the game is played because in some way shape or form we’re all leaders. Our team can be located on the job, in the home, in our social organizations, in our places of worship, or anywhere we are asked to solve a problem or give an opinion. Robert K. Greenleaf developed the concept of servant leadership in his book titled “Servant Leadership”.

A servant leader is not a “me first” leader. He doesn't accomplish his purpose first and then see how he can help the other members of this team. A true servant leader will first determine the needs of his team and use his intellectual nature to figure out a way to assist them prior to accomplishing his purpose. Now I'm not saying that we will solve others problems or even our own on the 1st try.  Many problems are difficult and may have us pulling our hair out. My advice is not to quit but to hang in there because it’s part of our maturing process.

You see, my friend, problems are the stepping-stones on the road to success. And if you have read or seen my earlier posts, I never said success was easy. However, if we are passionate about what we’re doing then each problem we encounter will lead to an opportunity. These opportunities will then lead to breakthroughs. These breakthroughs will be a blessing in our lives and the lives of others. We can stay connected to our passion and our purpose by constantly revisiting our spiritual nature (Mentor) and allowing it to provide direction to our intellectual nature (Coach) during turbulent times.

Servant Leaders are made and not born. We need more of them in our businesses, organizations and homes. We can build/rebuild strong organizations, institutions, societies and countries by putting the needs of others before our own.  Just take a look at what a man named Jesus accomplished using this model of leadership.

I hope that you enjoyed this post and until next time here’s hoping that you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God Bless!

Defining and Finding Success

 In this post I would like to discuss the concept of success and as you well know, success means different things to different people. Dictionary.com defines it as: The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like. Why don't we take a look at this common definition? Many of us automatically connect success with the attainment of material possessions, position, honors, who we know or where we go.

Now, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with any of these things. However some believe that their attainment will make their lives successful, happier, more meaningful and productive. Let me ask you a question. How many of us have heard of people who have more money, houses, cars, titles, etc. than one can ever dream of, and still aren’t happy because they’re not living the lives they had envisioned for themselves? If you wish to know who they are just look in the tabloids, surf the Internet or simply watch the evening news.

Here's a thought for you. Wealth, position and material possessions are simply means to an end. They were created in order to help us attain our purpose for living. They should not be the goal itself. My point is that when we obtain things in a way that’s not connected with our purpose then these things seem hollow and do not bring us the good feeling that we’re looking for? For example Steven Jobs, the founder of Apple Computer, acquired vast sums of cash and material possessions in order to fulfill his vision of bringing people closer together through the use of technology. Money and material possessions weren’t his goal; they were his tools.

Since we’ve seen that success isn’t necessarily connected to material possessions, then what is it? I define success as gaining and attaining the desires of your heart. Each one of us has a function or purpose in life that only we can fulfill. It's our spiritual nature (mentor) that places these desires in our heart and makes certain they’re aligned with our highest and best good or purpose for living.

Are you aware of the many individuals who were successful even though they had very little cash or material possessions? Look at the lives of Five-Star General and U.S. President Dwight Eisenhower, Gandhi and Mother Theresa to name a few. The point I’m making is that success is nothing more than a value judgment. It’s true value exists only in the mind of the person making the judgment, including our own.

And finally, while I’m at it, allow me to share that you don’t have to be perfect to be successful. All of us have issues that we have to deal with. The good news is that we have our spiritual, intellectual and physical natures to signal us when we stray from our purpose. We just have to remain in the moment to be made aware of these signals.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post. Until next time here’s hoping you live today and everyday passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless.

7 Steps to Finding and Living Out Our Purpose

What's your purpose? What reason do you have for getting up each morning and going through the day? I'm not looking for some altruistic answer such as: to make the world a better place or to get rich (which is not so altruistic). It can be as simple as: to be a better parent or get a better education or to spend more time with loved ones. The point I am making is that without an overreaching goal or purpose for living we will be at the effect of life and not at cause with it. We would be like a rudderless and powerless ship on the surface of the ocean being forced to go wherever the wind or current takes us.

7 steps to help us define and live out our purpose:

1.     Articulate it. Speak it as if your purpose has already been accomplished. For example say: “I am a great parent” or “I am educated”.  There is power in the spoken word.
2.     Write it down or place an image of it in a place where you will see it daily. This act in and of itself will signal your intellect through the use of your subconscious mind to direct the body’s actions towards your purpose.  This worked for me as a young lieutenant in the Marines when I had purposed myself to become a Naval Aviator. I placed a picture of myself, seated inside the type aircraft I wanted to fly, on my bathroom mirror. Two years later I was assigned to a squadron and flew in that type aircraft.
3.     Trust it. Here is where many of us become discouraged and afraid because we fear the unknown and cannot lay out a specific roadmap or timeframe. In these instances we must trust that our mentor will always lead us in the direction of our highest and best good.
4.     Visualize it. As many times as possible throughout the day use your imagination to see yourself as if you've already accomplished your purpose.
5.     Live it. Allow yourself to act it out in your life. No longer allow yourself to be tied to old ways and habits. Become one and at cause with life and your purpose.
6.     Review it. From time to time review whether or not the results you are receiving are in line with your purpose. Be aware that many times our intellectual nature allows certain negative core beliefs to interfere with the successful achievement of our purpose
7.     Refine it. As we find ourselves nearing our goal it may be necessary that we tweak it to fit our individual circumstances. Don’t be too concerned about this because our mentor/spiritual nature will signal us when necessary.

I hope that you find these 7 steps useful in determining and living out your purpose. Did you notice how our spiritual-intellectual-physical natures complement each other in attaining our purpose? 

Until next time here's hoping that you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless!

How to Embrace Life

In this post I will continue with my discussion on how to experience life's tough times and problem areas in a manner that keeps us calm, confident, creative and connected to our goals and ultimate life's purpose. I know it’s a big order but you'll see it's not as difficult as it sounds. We just have to make a few assumptions.

The 1st assumption is you have read and understand my prior posts on our spiritual, physical and intellectual natures. Next, we assume that in tough times our intellectual nature (coach) reviews the possible solutions available to us, chooses the one it wants and then sends in the play for our body to complete. Our intellectual nature performs this function because our “free will” resides there.

So the question really becomes “How does our coach know what play to send in”? In ideal situations the coach has a relationship with and consults our spiritual nature (mentor) prior to sending in a play. This is especially necessary when we are experiencing those one-of-a-kind problems frequently thrown at us by life.

We won’t always come up with the “perfect” solution to the problem. As a matter of fact, we may not come up with a solution at all. That’s because the job of our mentor is to lead us in the direction of our highest and best good. Unfortunately, sometimes we’ll have to experience tough times in order to get there. That's why it's so important that we develop a close working relationship with this spiritual nature. It will somehow let us know that what we are experiencing is ok.

As faith in this relationship increases so will our ability to confidently deal with life's tough times. I'm reminded of a quote by Emmanuel Teney. who says: “As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit.”

As the interconnectedness between our spiritual, intellectual and physical nature matures we will begin to embrace life, be less prone to worry and reduce our stress levels by not trying to control how things must be. We will recognize that we have a competent mentor and coach to help us experience life in the physical world as it unfolds. We’ll also learn that tough times occur when we resist what’s going on in our life.

Also, by understanding and utilizing the previously discussed law of cause and effect we are able to choose our response to life. We can choose either to become victors over what's going on in our life or to become victimized by these same issues. The choice is simple and the choice is ours.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this series on our spirit-mind-body connection. In my next few posts I'll discuss how to apply this concept to areas of leadership, productivity, health and our work-life balance. Until then here's hoping you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless.

Solving Life's Problems Using Our 3-Part Nature

In this post I will tie together the 3 aspects of our human nature, namely the spiritual, intellectual and physical. I’ve discussed our spiritual nature (inner voice) in previous posts. I’ve also discussed our intellect and stated that it houses our “free will”. If I had to assign roles to these natures, I would say the spiritual performs the role as “Mentor” and our intellect as “Coach”.

In the past, I likened our spiritual nature to a GPS, which unerringly provides us directions towards our destination. It doesn't matter where we’re located because it knows how to guide us safely to our chosen destination. And as you know a mentor is defined as a trusted counselor or guide. It's our spiritual nature or mentor that often guides us to a solution to those one-of-a-kind problems that are unsolvable by intellect alone.

My goal in this post is to provide a simplistic overview of how the different aspects of our nature interrelate as we experience life's tough times and problem areas. It’s not to tell you how to go about your normal day-to-day activities, which are usually placed on cruise control anyway. By that I mean, upon waking each day we normally use the restroom, cleanup, get something to eat and then complete our daily activities. At the end of each day we do what is necessary to prepare for the next, and so on. Our intellect handles this aspect of our life quite well.

When life’s tough times and problem areas occur, our intellect (consisting of our mind, will, desires and emotions) chooses a desired outcome. It then allows our GPS to issue directions and guide us towards our desired destination.

Additionally, our intellect (Coach) sends instructions to our physical body (which assumes the role of “Player”) that allow us to interact with other bodies and the material world. Our bodies do nothing more than wait on the sidelines for the coach to send in a play (“Gimme the ball coach, Gimme the ball”). It then uses its physical attributes to carry out that play to the best of its ability.

Our physical body is a complex, finite organism that has no volition of its own. It returns to the earth when our intellectual nature/life force no longer occupies it. It does however have the necessary intelligence to monitor its own operation and sends signals back to the coach when it detects an internal malfunction or breakdown. A simple analogy is that our body is like an automobile that’s useless until occupied by a driver (intellect/life force).

The take away from this post is that in order to successfully experience the tough times and problem areas of life in a manner that keeps us calm, confident, creative and connected to our guide, we must understand how to employ an integrated approach that involves our 3-part nature. This is accomplished when the “Mentor” provides guidance to the “Coach” who directs the activities of the “Player”.

I will provide more examples of how this works in my next post. Until then, here's hoping that you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless!

Intellect and Awareness - The Dynamic Duo

In my last post entitled “Be aware of your instincts”; I discussed “The Intellect” and how it interacts with our three-part nature. I stated that while it is a valuable tool in solving empirical problems, it is not very useful alone in solving the one-of-a-kind personal problems we find in life. I have already shared with you a few of my successes; now let me share with you an area of personal setback. It's not an area I'm proud of but I share it in order help you to not make the same mistakes I made and to say that it's not important what happens to us in life. It's how we respond to what happens to us that really counts.

As a matter of fact, if you are like me, the more I use my intellect alone to solve personal problems it seems the more personal problems I get. For example, early in life as a result of my engineering background and problem solving ability, I concluded that I should easily be able to find a mate and life's partner. I thought if she was attractive, articulate and intelligent then we would make a good couple. Sound a bit chauvinistic, don't I? Boy, was I wrong!

It took me 3 divorces to figure out that there is much more to finding a mate than their looks, conversation and intelligence. I found out that I should be aware of their home life, interaction with their parents, past history, emotional stability and many other things. I also needed to be aware of how we connected and interacted together on a personal basis. However, I only saw my potential mates as I wanted to see them and not for whom they really were.

In seeing them that way, my mind created a person that never really existed. This wasn't their problem; it was mine. I gave them attributes they never really had and assumed their life’s goals were the same as mine. However, I did determine an interconnection between our intellect and awareness.

Wikipedia states that Awareness is the state or ability to perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects, or sensory patterns. Had I been more aware and in the moment, I would have paid more attention to those areas where I sensed incompatibilities in my relationships. Understand that I am not blaming anyone. I am just stating I should have examined my feelings more closely at those times. However, since I had always created my relationships in the same manner, it wasn’t until I hit rock bottom that I was ready to try something new.

As a result I spent a number of years using my intellect to learn about personal and interpersonal relationships and the secrets to their success. After applying these principles I was finally able to sustain a good relationship for more than a few years.  My point is that without this proper combination of intellect and awareness, I would’ve been doomed to failure.

Now relationships aren't the only areas of life where we continually butt our heads against the wall. Other areas may include health, finances, purpose for living, etc. and we will discuss these in future posts. Until then here's hoping that you live today and every day passionately and with purpose. Thank you and God bless!